Diesel Bundren: Co-Head Gamemaker, 84th Hunger Games

Hi there!  Nice to meet you, y'know, you look really nice today! 
My name is Diesel Bundren, and I'm the co-Head Gamemaker of the 84th Hunger Games. I'm the mastermind behind the big gimmick of the Arena, and I must say that everything is going exactly as planned. You guys are gonna piss your pants when you see what I've come up with!! I'm clever and charming and never afraid to speak up. I have a thick accent of a people long dead, so-called "Irish." Basically it means that I have a different voice than my family, and also I was able to pick up a dead language called Gaelic from my family.
My mother Sharon's a real bitch, and my father's a lot more laidback.  She thinks he's a bum and regrets letting him give me my first name. She calls me by my middle name, Brian.  I don't respond to Brian. 
I'm not really one that goes into the bright colors like many around me.  I have dark hair that's natural and bright blue eyes which are contacts totally natural.  
I'm proudly bisexual and like to spend my nights having fun, if you know what I'm mean. I'm arranged to be married to Santana the prude, but I won't let being married to her tie me down. I won't let anything or anyone tie me down.
I was the top of my class in university, but that's the least of my qualifications for the job.  I have stage presence, I can get people to love me. Plus, I served time as a Peacekeeper in District 12, as well.  That's how I got many of my tattoos, from the dead Celtic race.  The tattoo artist from 12 was a real diamond in the rough, so to speak.  He was vulnerable and heartbroken and of course I exploited him a little bit. He was such a pretty face, though. I hope we get to see ol' Dennis Kasparek in this story. He's hot.
Anyways, off that topic. While I was serving as a Peacekeeper I tricked myself into thinking I was in love with one of my friends from home, Viridian Turner.  Who has a crush on my sister Katie.  Who has a crush on his sister Vienna.  Who has a crush on me.  It just goes around full circle, and I'm still the only one that knows it. It was all just a joke, I was afraid of dying, it wasn't real. Of course not. Even so, I call him my little Tweety Bird because he somehow always manages to run away right before I'm able to get him in my bed. But someday, I promise you.  He'll have to sleep with me. He's autistic and the Games make him nervous, so he didn't want me to hook him up with a job. Shame, he would've made a pretty little secretary. 
I know you'll be impressed by these Games and my work. And I hope you enjoy the show! 
~Diesel Bundren